“Cheese it, the fuzz!”

Whatever happened to Joe Berger? OK, that question won’t mean much to those who aren’t familiar with my fraternity, but this week the Weekly World News brings you “HOW TO TELL IF YOUR PROSTITUTE IS AN EXTRATERRESTRIAL (all caps theirs.)

A sample, out of their list of ten:

2. Out-of-date lingo — Alien prostitutes try to fit in by using streetwalker slang — but often use outdated terms. A hooker who sees a police car and whispers, “Cheese it, the fuzz!” likely hails from deep space.

They come in threes.

So I hear that Ossie Davis and Max Schmeling passed away on the radio this morning. And apparantly, John Vernon Dean Wormer from “Animal House” also just died.

Aside from the eerie coincidence that “they come in threes” actually applied this time without much of a stretch, it’s a sad loss of some quality talent.

Norwegians know the truth about Bush…

Norwegians Confused by Bush Salute

OSLO, Norway – President Bush’s “Hook ’em, ‘horns” salute got lost in translation in Norway, where shocked people interpreted his hand gesture during his inauguration as a salute to Satan.

That’s what it means in the Nordics when you throw up the right hand with the index and pinky fingers raised, a gesture popular among heavy metal groups and their fans in the region.

For Texans, the gesture is a sign of love for the University of Texas Longhorns, whose fans are known to shout out “Hook ’em, ‘horns!” at sporting events.

I hadn’t any idea that the same sign was used for anything but the heavy metal thing, and while I’d heard the phrase “Hoom ’em horns” I’d never had any idea what the f it meant or referred to. Some UT team, as it says above? Sports fans, weird folks…

New Zealand rocks…

Seriously, I can’t decide if this is incredibly cool or just sorta cool and incredibly funny…

Sex Industry – A Guide to Occupational Health and Safety in the New Zealand
(per the site being linked to, the document in question contains sexually explicit material.)

WHEN THE PROSTITUTION REFORM BILL WAS BEING CONSIDERED BY THE Justice and Electoral Select Committee, committee members recommended that health and safety guidelines should be developed for the sex industry. As the lead agency responsible for workplace health and safety, the Department of Labour’s Occupational Safety and Health
Service (OSH) led the development of this Guide.
The Prostitution Reform Bill was passed into law on 27 June 2003. This means that the sex industry now operates under the same health and safety rules as any New Zealand industry.

Beware of elephant?

Elephant chews on finger

November 9, 2004

AN Australian man’s holiday of a lifetime has ended in agony when an elephant bit off his finger outside a bar in Thailand.

Although still in pain, Greg Black, of Sunrise Beach, said yesterday he could still manage to see the funny side of the freak pachyderm mauling which happened in the resort town of Pattaya last month.

Mr Black said it all began about midnight on October 17 after he’d had about 10 beers in a Walking St bar. “A man came by with a young elephant and I paid 20 baht [40c] to feed it,” he said.

Mr Black said as he pulled his hand from the animal’s mouth he saw his right little finger had been shredded.

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